Published on 11/10/2012 in Better Life
Whatever you may choose to call it: “Spanking the monkey”, “saying hello to Lucas Mangope”, “riding the dolphin”, “choking the chicken” are just some of the euphuisms guys like to use for the dreaded word, masturbation. A month doesn’t go by where I don’t get emails from readers about this subject. Questions such “I masturbate three times before breakfast, is this normal?” and “I recently caught my man playing with himself, we have sex all the time, am I not good enough for him?”
I would like to venture into this taboo topic which derives a lot of giggles for teenagers to something a lot of men do in the comfort of their homes. Masturbation seems to have a negative psychological impact on men. Many feel shame and guilt because of it. Whether it’s a cultural, religious or moral issue, people are very hard on themselves (no pun intended). Ever since men learned to enjoy stroking their mambas, there have been myths constructed to make them feel bad about it.
Why do men feel the need to peel their bananas?
One of the leading clinical sexologist Dr. Hernando Chaves, a professor on human sexuality in Beverly Hills (California) says the reason why we masturbate is that it’s simply good for us. He states that masturbation helps us fall asleep, reduces stress and tension.
If masturbation caused acne then 90% of the guys would be walking with faces full of zits. Perhaps you’ve heard masturbation causes sterility. It’s true that having consecutive ejaculations reduces sperm counts and the volume of semen compared to the first ejaculation, but testes are factories for sperm and masturbation is not going to close down that factory.
But there must be side-effects for cleaning ones pumps too much, right? It’s called compulsive masturbation.
Compulsive masturbating is when a person has difficulties in his life resulting from his masturbation habits. One guy masturbates three times a day and feels productive and great while the other feels the exact opposite. Compulsive masturbation can negatively affect one’s work, relationships, self-esteem, finances, social support, and have legal problems if you’re not able to find a balance between being responsible in life and satisfying your pleasures and desires.
If a guy has a girlfriend or wife that believes that masturbation is disgusting or doesn’t understand why her man should pleasure himself when she’s available, it shows that the couple have not expressed their sexual needs and desires to each other. A woman who isn’t perturbed by her man’s masturbation habits, and sometimes takes part in the act, stands to have a more fulfilling relationship then the one who thinks the act is shameful and disgusting. Needless to say the guy will continue to privately wank away while she’s watching Generations.
In life there are positives and negatives to everything, sex, singlehood, driving a car, being in a relationship, and working. We have to make sure the good outweighs the bad to find happiness and fulfilment.